Showing posts with label random. Show all posts
Showing posts with label random. Show all posts

January 12, 2010

Quote of the Day

A fellow McFatty Monday'er inspired me today with this quote:

"We have time for whatever we choose to do, so let's own our choices!"

November 18, 2009

Just for fun: A Quiz

1. When did you find out you were pregnant?
September 18th, 2008

2. How did you find out you were pregnant?
We had been testing with dollar store tests all week, even though we knew it was really too early. I was getting discouraged, so we went to Wegman's to pick up a pack of EPTs. I tested in the bathroom while Andy checked out, but it was negative. I carried the stick out to the car and all the way home. When Andy stopped to get the mail the car light turned on and I thought I saw a very faint line. When we got home, we held it up to the light in the garage and it was definitely positive.

3. How old were you?
26

4. What was your reaction?
It was unbelievable because it had been only 2 weeks since we started trying and the line was SO faint! We were laughing and crying. It was surreal.

Can you see it?
5. Who did you tell first?
Within five minutes we were knocking on the door of our friends' house who live across from us. We both went in late to work the next morning so we could tell our parent's in person.
PS. They're pregnant now! Due in April :)

Before 6 in the morning :)


6. Did you want to find out the sex?
Yes! We found out at 17 weeks 2 days...BOY! We had our ultrasound in the morning, but didn't find out until our "Sex Reveal" party later that night. Here's where we opened the envelope!

I thought he was going to be a girl :)

Andy was excited!
7. Due date?
May 31, 2009.

8. Did you deliver early or late?
2 weeks early at 38 weeks 2 days. Roscoe was born on May 19th.

9. Did you have morning sickness?
Nothing that a lot of snacking didn't take care of. I felt nauseated every day for the first 11 or 12 weeks, but by 13 weeks my morning sickness had disappeared.

10. What did you crave?
I ate bagels with cream cheese and tomatoes every morning during the first trimester. But I had only one memorable craving: orange juice with extra pulp. It occurred late one night and required Andy to make a run to three different gas stations to find it.
Sans makeup, 11:30 at night...in bed!

11. What irritated you the most?

The uncertainty. I hated spotting in the 7th and 9th weeks. It put me on edge for the rest of the pregnancy. Oh and the lack of support we had for our home birth.

12. How did you pick the name?
We found it in a baby book and instantly liked it, but it just kept growing on us. Then, when I shared our list of possible names with a coworker, he told me that one of his favorite songs is Roscoe by Midlake. We listened to it on repeat for months, and it sealed the deal.

13. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy?
Somewhere around 45 pounds.

14. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy?
None other than spotting early in the first trimester.

15. Where did you give birth?
At home!

16. How many hours were you in labor?
5 1/2 hours. My water broke at 2:00 pm and contractions started 30 minutes later. Roscoe was born at 7:54 pm.

17. Who attended your labor?
Andy, my midwife, and doula. My sister and mom were downstairs cooking Roscoe's birthday dinner, and they joined us within a few minutes of his birth.

18 . Did you take medicine to ease the pain?
No.

19 . How much did your child weigh?
7lbs 2oz


20 . What did you name him/her?
Roscoe Ellis Hopper

We kept Roscoe's name a secret until he was born, but we had a newborn gown embroidered with his name. Here are a few photos from when my sister and mom found out what we named him:




21 . How old is your first born today?
6 months tomorrow!

22. Who does your child look like?
He has Andy's fair skin and red hair, but his features are a mix of both of us. He has Andy's brow, and feet, but my lips, dimples and eyes. We're not sure about his nose.


23. Did you get mad at your husband during labor?
No.

24. What do you miss most about being pregnant? I loved carrying him with me everywhere I went, especially during my commutes slugging into the city and riding the metro. In the beginning in particular, he was like a little secret that I carried around with me.

25. What do you miss most about life before baby?
I miss the control I had over the simple stuff like sleeping, eating, working out, and leaving the house.

November 7, 2009

No apology necessary

A fellow blogger recently admitted that as a mother to a 3 week old she now understands the shaken baby syndrome. Last I checked she had over 60 comments from other mothers unanimously identifying with and applauding her for candid bravery. A repetitive theme emerges where they unite over the understanding of why it occurs, while at the same time taking careful steps to fully reassure each other that they would NEVER take it that far.

I'm not one to hold in my feelings, and I have a hard time disguising my emotion. So when people ask me what it's like to have a new baby and if I just love it and if its the most amazing thing to have ever happened to me, I can't help but proceed to explain that while motherhood really is amazing, and fantastic, and every other wonderful thing I thought it would be, there are two sides to this story and one of 'em is kinda rough around the edges.

It's like a marriage proposal. Everyone you meet is so excited for your Big Day. The wedding. The engagement ring. They want to know all the details. Very little time is spent fawning over the reality of the proposal, which is that you have just engaged yourself to another human being and in doing so committed to spending the REST OF YOUR ENTIRE LIFE with them. Which does sound romantic when you haven't yet sealed the deal.

Ask any couple who've been together long enough and they will tell you that like maintaining any relationship, marriage is a lot of work. Not to downplay the good stuff that it also brings, but just wait until you hit a rough spot. There's only one road, and you're on it.

Next comes pregnancy. Surrounded by reminiscent parents projecting their excitement, showering me with birth stories and baby stories and kid stories, trying to drum up anticipation and reminding me how kids grow so fast and the next thing you know they're headed off to college... I felt bombarded with the rhetorical question, "Aren't you SO EXCITED?"

I think they glowed more than I did.

My reality was a minefield of emotion, with "excitement" landing somewhere near the bottom of my top ten. First came anxious, nervous, overwhelmed, stressed, inadequate, and exhausted. While other soon-to-be-moms referred to their babies by name, gushed how "in love" they already were, and personified their fetuses every movement, I was a Nervous Nelly too consumed with the little things to delight in the bigger picture.

I spent the fourth week of my pregnancy with fingers crossed for successful implantation, then disappointment set in when I started spotting in the 7th week, and emotional detachment came at week nine when the spotting turned to bleeding and I was forced to face the fact that my little zygote might not make it. From then on I was just playing it safe and counting down each day leading up to the last day of the 12th week which signified that I had successfully cleared the first trimester.

Conceiving and growing a baby was so incredible that I rationally could not believe that we--ME & ANDY--had made it happen. Maybe because I had wanted it for so long it just seemed too good to be true, so I quietly waited for the axe to fall. Regardless, I never did settle in with contentment. I felt stress related to announcing my pregnancy at work and hid it from my colleagues for 21 weeks. And I spent the weeks leading up to Roscoe's birth feeling as if I had missed something important because while others seemed so connected to their babies, I felt strangely disconnected, which led to a fear that I had sufficiently set the stage for Postpartum Depression from lack of proper bonding in utero.

But heck yeah I was excited to meet the product of Andy's and my calculated efforts in September! Who was this person we had created and how would we be changed?

The point to all this is that going through these common yet extraordinary life changes produces a range of emotion and while you feel every second, the dream of the thing is sometimes rosier than the reality of it.

So back to the shaken baby. I hate the idea that women should have to rewrite their experiences in order to live up to the expectations of other people. Shamed into silence because we are mothers after all, and these are our own kids we're talking about. But this is part of our reality, our new life with our babies. It's okay to feel the frustration. It doesn't make you a bad mother. In fact, it is in those moments that you realize how delicate and dependent the mother-child relationship really is. One reaction could change your entire world. And suddenly you've got perspective and a screaming baby is the least of your worries.

Enjoy the highs and the lows of your new role and appreciate how your patience grows each day. And talk about it for Pete's sake. No apologies.

November 4, 2009

Restless.

Looking forward to the Summer and to conceiving baby number two, I feel 1) pressure to lose these last 8 pounds that are hanging on for dear life, and get in shape. Seriously. Not in shape "for a mom", but my old shape, before Graves' disease 2) I need to do something crazy and fun 3) I need a vacation.

So. First off, I think I'm going to sign up for a half marathon. Reasonable training time, challenging distance (if you just had a baby). Sort of crazy (well, not really), but maybe fun.

Second, I think I want to hike the Grand Canyon. Maybe late Spring or early Summer?

My only reservation is whether we could do it with Roscoe on our backs. He'll be about 1 by then, but sunburn and attention span are my top worries. It would be fun to visit Arizona, the hike might be a little crazy, and the adventure would certainly count as a vacation. We could fly into Phoenix, hike to the bottom of the canyon, camp overnight, hike back up, and then drive to Sedona for a couple days of rest and relaxation. Red Rocks anyone?

Another fun idea: renewing our vows in Vegas... that 5 year anniversary is coming right up!

October 22, 2009

Marbles Rolling

When plans for Sunday brunch were canceled unexpectedly, we found ourselves all dressed up with nowhere to go. We sat on our bed with scowled faces for a good minute before Andy declared, "We're going to Richmond. Call your sister." And like giddy children we left for the south in a spontaneous hurry.

Back in the 23220 zip code we picked up Vanessa and headed straight for Bottom's Up Pizza, then to Bev's for ice-cream. Before we knew it, nap time had arrived, and we were headed back home.

While Roscoe slept, I considered the fact that our life will be in flux for the remainder of our child-rearing years. Like marbles rolling, momentum propels us into the future. As Roscoe masters new skills, his world just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Last night for the first time, he reached out with intent to touch Chloe, and was rewarded when his tiny hands clenched around a fistful of her fur.

Andy and I are fluent in the language of setting goals and laying out plans. So much so that there have been times when I felt as if I was living more in my future than in my present. Admittedly, I have experienced some very low moments where all I could do was chase dreams because my life at the time just didn't seem to be enough.

I've wanted kids for many, many years. I once wondered that if I ever got pregnant, and after the baby was born, if I might stare blankly at my new family and think to myself, "Well, now what?"With the ultimate goal achieved, would I be fulfilled or would I feel compelled to look elsewhere for the next challenge? Was it motherhood that I really wanted? Would my family be enough?

Those fears seem silly now because while it felt as if the world really did stand still in those first few weeks following Roscoe's birth, it quickly resumed! Now every day brings new challenges, new happiness, and new meaning to a life that I thought I already knew pretty well. Old experiences are new again when sharing them with your child. The opportunities and motivation to be a better human being, a better wife, and a better mother are constant. Now that Roscoe is here my love for my life has exploded. My lists of places I want to travel to, books I want to read, people I want to connect with, passions I want to dive into, just keep growing.

Now that Roscoe is here I appreciate that life is not forever.

As parents we're forced to adapt in order to meet the needs of our kids. Routines are fluid. Phases are temporary. Eventually even the worst (and best) will pass. As Roscoe's world expands, so does ours. We can't help but try our best to meet our kids where they are in order to challenge, delight, and encourage them to continue exploring. As they grow up, we grow too, and that is the pleasure and the pain of it.

September 24, 2009

a mom-storm

I read about an upcoming production in LA and NY titled "Expressing Motherhood". To get a taste watch the trailer on the home page.

In the online store you can purchase a tote bag with one woman's written interpretation of motherhood.

Here's mine:

It's hard to capture the experience but it's fun to try! Plus, this is truly a snap shot--one mom's view after only four months. I'd love to see mom-storms from other mothers in different stages. It would be interesting to chronologically order them and consider the continuity as well as the diversity of our experiences.

It says a lot about the pressure moms can feel when I was compelled not to include some of the more down trodden emotions that sometimes define my reality. It's expected that motherhood is this beautiful experience where the good far outweighs the bad to a point that it feels like a disservice to your offspring to even think, or worse, say what your days are really like. Every positive emotion has an equally awful opposite, and even if they're fleeting, it's part of the package. And if I've learned anything yet, it is that a new mom swings from extremes day to day.

Of course Roscoe's my greatest product to date--he's my little masterpiece. But the person I was before I became his mother remains here beneath the spit up and rumpled sweat pants. With the birth of your child you are suddenly thrust into motherhood. and. it. can. be. hard. 9 months helps to prepare you, but NOTHING can prepare you.

Mothering is the ultimate paradox. Never in my life have I been more blissfully content while at the same time more utterly miserable. It makes my head spin, and I'm pretty sure that once mothering begins, it doesn't end until you are dead.

Which is why I will cling fondly to every moment that I get to be Roscoe's mom, and pray I won't lose myself in the process.

September 20, 2009

Happy Sunday!


Lately, Roscoe's been making great use of his kerchief bib. This little guy produces a lot of drool!

September 12, 2009

A Fall Resolution

I will floss my teeth every night.

I'll admit this is spurred by an impending dentist appointment, but I really do believe in the importance of gum health!

August 10, 2009

Knock, knock...Meaghan and Travis calling!

We had some special visitors on Saturday!

Meaghan and Travis, my colleagues and cluster neighbors, drove from DC to finally meet Roscoe! Over the course of my pregnancy they endured my many pregnant lady stories, commuting catastrophes (they even volunteered to experience it first hand and commuted home with me for a (very mature and sophisticated) slumber party late in my third trimester), and perhaps best of all, they provided comic relief on a daily basis.

They brought with them a lovely bouquet of sunflowers, and the latest scoop on the AAMC work front. It was great to catch up and while Roscoe first slept, then nursed, he eventually enjoyed some attention from his new friends.


Thanks for braving the traffic and making the trip. I definitely miss our unofficial "lunch bunches" and hallway pow-wows, but look forward to resuming our antics come October.

August 7, 2009

Introducing Bebé Glotón

The latest controversy in the world of toys: a "breastfeeding" doll!


And here's the demonstration video:



The public's reaction has been mixed. Predictably, some feel that it sexualizes young girls, while others see it as a harmless mimicry doll joining the ranks of Tiny Tears, Baby Alive, and Betsy Wetsy. Then there are those that think it's just plain weird! It is the daisy halter (not the doll) that raises my eyebrow.

Here's one reasonable perspective.
What do you think?

P.S. Bebé Glotón translates to "baby glutten" and according to Urban Dictionary "glutten" is defined as "overeats, pigs out, obnoxious"!

August 5, 2009

Pumpkin Pops!

For the past several Summers I've had my eye on these great popsicle molds, but with work and life, I never got around to buying them.

Since I'm at home this Summer with plenty of time to burn, I bought three sets and every week I try a new recipe.

One of my favorite pops so far is this smooth, slightly earthy, pumpkin treat:
2 1/2 cups canned pumpkin
1/2 cup sweetened condensed milk
1 cup milk
1 tsp cinnamon
dash of nutmeg
dash of clove

This recipe is not all that sweet (a big factor in why I love it so much), but if sugar is your thing add more sweetened condensed milk to taste. Combine ingredients in a food processor until smooth, pour into molds, freeze for 8 hours.

This recipe makes about nine pops, and for all you WW fans, each one = 2 points.

July 9, 2009

"Special Agent" Jon

Today our good friend (and neighbor) graduated from the FBI Academy!

For the past 21 weeks he lived on campus and came home only on the weekends.

We knew he was working hard while he was away, but as we toured the grounds this afternoon I really got a sense for how physical, intense, and exciting his training must have been.

We're so proud of him! What an awesome achievement!

July 2, 2009

Time and Money

While some women shop for shoes, purses, or other fashion accessory, the object of my shopping affection has been for a long time paint chips, textiles, and upholstery. I love agonizing over the details of shade, shape, and form vs. function.

Shopping for items to furnish the spaces in which we live has always been somewhat of a hobby for me. And I never bring into the house a thing that I don't love.

When we found out we were expecting, our attention turned from the communal living spaces to Roscoe's nursery. We had been dreaming about the look and feel of his room long before he was conceived when we encountered an inspirational find from Richmond's favorite toy store: a sweet, hand knit bunny made of wool. With his purchase, our color scheme was born. From there, we scoured stores online and on foot to piece-by-piece create a cool, eclectic, nature themed space fit only for our little one.

Now that Roscoe is here, I spend a majority of my day perched on our bed nursing, napping, or keeping Roscoe company while he sleeps. With all this time spent idle, I've become quite good at surfing the Internet one handed. With the nursery complete, a house that's practically full, and a new baby, I've quickly found my way in the baby marketplace.

We'll have to tip our fed ex and UPS delivery men well this Christmas!

A few of my recent favorite purchases:

Twirls and Twigs seahorse recycled cotton blanket
Vulli Sophie the Giraffe Teether
Picky Stickies
Winkel
Skwish

June 9, 2009

9,861 days and many more!

As I sit in the car on the eve of my 27th birthday (Wow, I thought I was turning 26 until I typed that!) waiting for Jacqueline and R to return from a much anticipated La Leche League meeting, I am feeling nostalgic and thankful for life as I currently know it.

I have an amazing wife, a happy little son, and a lot of extras that so many others are not as fortunate to enjoy right now. So much has changed in the 10 years Jacqueline and I have been together, and yet the really important stuff remains the same.

Jacqueline is still the beautiful, bouncy-haired, California girl I met in high school—incredibly strong, independent, and free spirited.

We're still having so much fun, living the life we (more or less) dreamed and worked together to create.

And now, to top it all off, we have Roscoe, who brings with him a different set of challenges to navigate, but mostly happiness and joy, and a new appreciation for the fact that life will never again be what it was before he arrived.

I'm looking forward to the coming year and all that we get to experience as a new family of three.

May 17, 2009

Numbers

1: months it took to get pregnant
10: days post ovulation we got a positive pregnancy test
40: estimated number of bagels with cream cheese and tomato that Jacqueline ate in the first trimester
7: week of very first ultrasound
12: week we first heard the heartbeat on doppler
15: week I felt the baby move for the first time
17: week we found out Baby Sears was a BOY!
20: week Andy felt the baby kick for the first time
21: number of weeks I waited to share my baby news at work
31: week I first felt his hiccups
1: number of maternity pants purchased
32: number of belly pics I've taken
4: number of kids we want
6: containers of tums I have consumed since conception
24: hours of birthing class we attended (12 weeks, 2 hours each)
1: times I sent Andy on a pregnancy craving run (for "lots of pulp" orange juice)
3: baby showers thrown for Baby Sears
32: number of bibs we received
1: prenatal massages I've enjoyed
6: pounds I weighed at birth
8: pounds Andy weighed at birth
38: number of weeks I've been knocked up
2: number of weeks until due date

May 4, 2009

H1N1

Well, the Pig Flu (as non-PC as that name is) has finally hit Virginia: three confirmed cases as of today. Maryland has 12 "probable" cases awaiting confirmation, and while there has been talk of a case or two in the District, they too have yet to be confirmed.

As a pregnant woman, I am technically categorized as "high risk". A public health colleague of mine sent me the guidelines for treating pregnant women with H1N1, and I would really love to avoid catching the virus. Of course. Coupling the densely populated area with the heavy use of mass transit, I'm sure it will only be a matter of time before the DC metro area is teeming with new cases of H1N1. Andy is insisting that I wear a face mask during my commute. I have politely declined.

Sunday, as we checked out at the grocery store, Andy passed me a dollar to play the Lotto. When I went to the case to choose my game I shouted over: "Oh! I pick the Pig Flu one!" I was both giggling and feeling slightly offended at the same time. Way to capitalize on a pandemic, Virginia.



Blame it on not having my glasses, but I swear it said "WIN PIGS FLU". In the end, we won neither pig flu nor any other prize.
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